Showing posts with label home-schooling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label home-schooling. Show all posts

The Story of How I Learned How To Read and Write Without School


Kate Fridkis writes about being a young woman at Eat the Damn Cake and alternative education at Un-schooled.

This is going to be shocking, so please hold on to something steady: kids learn at different paces.

Wait, there’s more…They learn from doing things, rather than just being told about how to do things. And here’s the most terrifying, overwhelming part: they don’t really need to be “taught.”

The Innovative Educator writes about how problematic standardized reading tests are. They fail to measure how well a student will be able to read (which is usually quite well, given some time and support), and instead place enormous amounts of pressure on students to be at the same level as their peers, even when we have plenty of information about how the factors that influence when students will begin to read fluently have nothing to do with the classroom.

And what about writing? Lisa worries that too much emphasis is being placed on formalized written communication. She suggests that writing doesn’t feel relevant for students, because their projects stay within the classroom, rather than relating to the world outside it. They could be writing blogs and columns and letters to the editor. But they write essays that begin with a thesis statement, are followed with two points in defense of the thesis, then a counterpoint, a summary, and a neat conclusion.

She asked me how I learned to write. Which is something I remember much better than I remember a lot of things that happened that long ago.

But first, this is how I learned to read: my parents read to me. All the time.
(My dad was a pro at reading this one. source)

Books were exciting and mysterious and magical. I don’t know a single unschooled kid who didn’t learn to love reading. We learned at different ages, of course, but no one had to take a test, and so no one got left behind.

Teachers are sometimes amazed to learn that a kid who started reading at four and a kid who started learning at twelve will read with the same fluency at thirteen.

As the founder and leader of The Manhattan Free School, Pat Werner recently explained to a group of educators, kids never stop learning. They are learning all along. They don’t “learn to read” the moment when they pick up a book and can sound out the words. They’ve been processing relevant information since they were born, and that moment is only the moment when the information begins to fit together in a way others can plainly observe and categorize.

My mother worked with me, showing me how to shape letters with my pen. And then she gave me a journal. Every day, from the time I turned seven or so, I wrote a sentence or two in my journal. I wrote about my life. What toys I wanted for the next big holiday. Why my brother had hurt my feelings. How much it was snowing. How much I enjoyed going to the Sam’s Club because of the free snacks they gave out. Lots of scintillating, forbidden, and provocative pieces about my secret desire for more ice cream. The subject matter wasn’t the point– what was important was my connection to it.
(I always wanted one that looked like this. source)

Later, when I was nine or so, I wrote stories about stories. Stories inspired by the books we were reading together and I was reading on my own. And I illustrated those stories. There aren’t very many stories from that time in my life that aren’t accompanied by marker and colored pencil sketches of princesses in gowns speckled with fat pearls. I don’t know why, but they always had pearls on their dresses. I think that meant they were really rich.

It seems like I shouldn’t have any concept of grammar. Mom used to sit me down with a purple grammar book, and one with a picture of an owl on the cover. I memorized a string of prepositions once. But we weren’t thorough. And we didn’t need to be. I already knew how to write in complete sentences. Grammar was memorization. It was meaningless. Writing was expression. It was natural.

I learned grammar from every book I read, from the way my parents spoke, from Mom reading over what I wrote and saying, “Why does this sound wrong? What would you change to make it sound right?” Grammar is what sounds right. You know how words fit together when you read for hours every day. You also get pretty good at punctuating.

My very smart schooled friends sometimes make grammar jokes that I don’t get. They reference past participles, dangling modifiers, and synecdoches. I put in a polite laugh and nod to show that I’m educated. And then when I write something that doesn’t seem right I read it aloud. How does it sound?

My grammar isn’t perfect. But not a single college professor has ever had a problem with it. Freshman year, one of them even nominated me for a writing fellowship.

It sounds too simple. How can people learn things if they aren’t taught the proper way? If information isn’t broken down for them into bite-sized, manageable little chunks? It’s almost like magic, and no one seems willing to believe in it. No one seems willing to believe in how much children are capable of learning and doing when they’re permitted to exist in a world where everything is interconnected.

As a kid, everything I wrote was related to my life. Everything I wrote was part of something bigger. It was never an isolated essay, it was part of a collection; a journal, an illustrated fairytale about a larger fairytale with much sturdier binding and better cover design.
Writing was connected to drawing which was connected to reading which was connected to experiencing the world which was connected to fairy princesses. The world could not be separated from writing the world. Even now, I want to write about all of the interesting things I read. Luckily, I no longer have the urge to draw princesses in pearled gowns in the margins.

So Lisa, I hope that helps answer your question.
(source)
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Good college, bad college

Posted originally on Un-schooled.

People say “college” like it’s just a stage of life. You go somewhere called college, you party, you learn, you’re happy, and after that, for the rest of your life, you get to say things like, “Aw, man…college….” with a distant look in your eyes and a slow, wistful shake of your head.

But on a really basic level, there is good college and bad college. I know, because I went to both. I started out at a giant state school, and then I went to a small, Ivy League school. When people ask me about the state school, I usually defend it. I say, “You know, that kind of environment forces you to be self-sufficient. And there are some incredible professors. If you’re in the right department, it’s a great education, and you don’t go completely bankrupt after."


(college. it doesn’t always look like this. source)

These things are all true. But I don’t mention the part about getting locked out of the dorm in the rain when I forgot my keycard by a big, mean guy who told me he’d let me in if I could prove that I wasn’t a thief. About my adviser retiring without anyone letting me know, and then receiving an email two months before graduation that stated I wouldn’t be able to graduate because my language requirement hadn’t been properly fulfilled. Or the night I called the campus police three times in a row because I couldn’t leave my room– there were guys pounding each other to a pulp in the hall. The dispatcher sounded unsympathetic. “It might take a while. They’re across campus.”

They never came. Eventually, an ambulance came, to take away someone who was unconscious.

Or what about the girl who cursed me off in class, for asking her to please stop using the word “faggot”? She called me a lot more things than that, in front of a quivering, helpless assistant professor, who, after she’d stomped out, told me apologetically, “Kids say these things a lot, I hear. Even in middle school. It’s not a big deal.”

Or my personal favorite: the teacher who found out that I’d been homeschooled and when I tried to answer a question in class informed the other students conspiratorially, “Kate doesn’t understand how these things work because she was homeschooled.” Awesome.

These are things that just don’t happen at some schools. Like at Stanford, where my husband went. When I talk about freshman year with him, he says, “I don’t even want to tell you about how annoyingly nice everyone was to everyone my freshman year.” He wished they would give him some space and stop bringing him cookies. I wished boys would stop yelling things about sex positions at me on the way to the dining hall. I wished I felt safe doing my laundry (a girl had been raped somewhere in the labyrinthine basements). I wished I had called 911 when a man tried to break in through my ground floor window in the middle of the night, rather than freezing in my
bed and waiting and waiting.

.
(or this. sheesh, it really looks like a place where the people are nice…source)

I am proud of the scholarships I got, and the practically negligible cost (compared to the small liberal arts schools that are so desirable) of a lot of my education. I’m proud of myself for being strong and finding mentors and doing well academically.

But I’m also angry. I’m angry that there are two distinct worlds of college, and that many students only have access to one of them. I’m angry that as a homeschooler, I didn’t know that there was a different kind of college out there. I thought that maybe all schools were just terrible. I hadn’t known what to expect, and so I accepted the environment without asking the right questions. I figured, “Well, everyone has to put up with this stuff to get a degree.”

But when I went to the other school, I realized that wasn’t true. At the Ivy League school, there were other problems. Frustratingly arrogant people, entitled people, intimidatingly famous professors, and flawless designer clothes. But no one was cruel. I never felt physically threatened. I never felt like a loser for being interested in the subject. I felt like I should be smarter, like I should try harder. I felt outmatched and intellectually naive. But when I wrote a good paper or made a good point, and people congratulated me or smiled or gave me an A, I knew it was because I was doing really well. Not just because I wasn’t asleep, or had actually read the book. Not just because I was one of the few who cared.

In the end, though, I think college is mostly about two things: getting a degree, and networking.

My biggest regret is that I didn’t get to network with enough people I respected at the first school I went to. People didn’t act as dedicated to their futures. They didn’t end up going into fields that interested me. There’s a whole discussion about class and wealth that needs to happen here, but it requires a lot more attention than I can give it right now. I will say that at the state school, some of the students I knew were working two jobs and commuting. They were almost too exhausted to pass. Many of the students were happy to have gotten into college, and had no goals beyond it. A lot of the students retained attitudes that must’ve worked well for them in middle school and high school. “Learning is lame.” They were not the students who had done well in their classes as kids.They had learned to be defensive.

Going to college did a lot of important things for me. I learned a lot about the way the world works. About sucking up. About fitting in. About avoiding being raped. Important skills. And most importantly, I got the degrees I needed to look valid. But if I could have spent the whole time at the second school and forgone the first, it would have been better, without question. I wish I had had that option. I wish everyone had that option. Or the option not to go at all.
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Not knowing how smart you are is more fun

By guest contributor Kate Fridkis
Cross-posted on Un-schooled.

I didn’t take any tests as a kid. None.

I wrote about how I didn't get graded as a kid yesterday in my post Making the Grade where I shared how I learned in college that grades were both really important and really random. Well, because I didn't get grades before college, I sometimes feel like I don’t know how smart I am. I didn't go through the usual sorting process. I never properly learned where I fit into the hierarchy of intelligence.

Maybe that doesn’t even seem like a big deal. Maybe it’s like, Ok, so you didn’t take tests…So what? Maybe you wonder how my progress was tracked. What if I never got better at anything? Oh my god! It’s true! I still can’t name the organelles. A few months ago, My fiancĂ© and I were trying to remember them all. Every time he came up with one, I’d be like, “Yeah! The Golgi apparatus! Totally! I was about to remember that one!”

I got good at sketching, and then painting. I did it every day. When you do something every day, you get better at it, no matter what it is. Which is why you should be careful if you’re yelling at people every day. That’s not something it’s good to be good at. And if you love something, or at least enjoy doing it, or feel motivated at all to keep doing it of your own volition, then you’re going to get even better at it than you otherwise would.

There wasn’t a test for painting. There were plenty of tests for other things, but I didn’t take them either. What would the point have been? I wasn’t being compared to anyone else, I wasn’t in a grade, and I didn’t have to move on to another grade. And progress, believe it or not, is pretty self-evident. It also happens at different rates for different areas of learning. I didn’t learn how to read at the same rate that I learned how to recognize individual birdsong. I didn’t learn how to draw hands at the same rate that I learned how to play a Chopin Nocturne. In fact, it took me at least a decade before I could capture hands with any real accuracy. But I wonder if I ever would’ve gotten there at all if I’d failed the hand drawing test after the first year of trying. Maybe I would’ve thought I was just inherently bad at drawing hands. Maybe it wouldn’t have felt worthwhile anymore.

There is a lot of debate about intelligence. Remember that book The Bell Curve, by Richard Herrnstein and Charles Murray? It is really, really thick. It has a big rainbow lump on the cover. It’s all about intelligence, and how a person’s success is pretty much determinable by how smart a standardized test says they are. As it turns out, according to The Bell Curve, Jews are definitely, on average, smarter than black people. Or at least, that’s what I got out of the section on race. Stephen Jay Gould wrote a book called The Mismeasure of Man about fifteen years before Herrnstein and Murray came out with The Bell Curve, but, laughing sadly to himself, Gould stuck a few more chapters on Mismeasure and republished, saying, “Seriously? We’re still talking about this?” He also said something along the lines of, “One of the big problems here is that people think intelligence is only one thing, and that thing is measurable by a single method.”

People think that intelligence is quantifiable. Well, I’m sure parts of it are. But the whole thing? Isn’t that a little too complex to summarize in a number?

The reality is that absolutely everyone learns. Almost anyone is capable of learning anything. It might take an incredibly long time. It might take a really good teacher. It might take a ton of dedication. A lot of successful learning is the result of feeling capable of learning. At least, that’s what I think. And when you learn that you’re bad at learning something, well—why would you ever want to keep trying? The kids who keep trying amaze me. They’re incredible.

There are things I know absolutely nothing about. Topics I sound idiotic on. I’m unpredictable, rather than well-rounded. But not knowing how smart I am is pretty nice. I feel like I have a lot of potential. I feel like I might be able to do anything.
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